Pain is Love

I cause the most pain to people who love me. Sometimes I even do it on purpose because I need to know how much they care. So it's like I stab them with a knife and twist it just to hear them yell. So I would know that I matter.

I never knew I could be so passive-agressive and have rage that uncontrollable. But what I do know is I'm trying. I'm working on it. I'm trying to be that better person. I've realised a pattern. I know that I do that thing where I get pissed and don't stay in touch. I realise that sometimes I do things that I regret and I just let it happen in a moment of blind rage.

I'm only human. But that also means that I can only be better.

Thanks for the faith.