Bridging the Gap

So on Thursday evening, after dinner and a tall glass of beer, I was very high. My friend had to leave (and get drunk again another day) and I took the train from City Hall to Woodlands. I suppressed to burst out giggling. My face was red and swelling with blood. I looked like the cuter, chubbier version of me. I concentrated on my handphone games to avoid people's stares. It was obvious that I was in a different world from them.

It was 12AM. Yay. Merry Christmas. I reached Woodlands, feeling kind of lost and still a little high. I withdrew 50 bucks from the ATM, trying to keep my balance while stumbling into 7-11 and I grabbed the cheapest beer I could find.

With my mp3 player plugged into my ears, I started walking to the Causeway by myself. It was dark and slightly spooky. I turned around more than once to check for people behind me, but with the alcohol pumping through my veins I was less concerned about my well-being than I should have been.

I was singing at the top of my voice as I passed Republic Poly, then huge roads with factories on one side, and Admiralty park on the other. There were many heavy vehicles and a bus park. The Chang beer tasted nasty but I gulped it down any way. I continued walking to the place where I used to go often when I was young. I haven't been back there in the past decade.

The view was a let down. There was construction going on. The air was still.

I continued walking, until my legs took me home. Thankfully my mp3 player lasted all the way, as the singers wailed their advice on life and love to me... it kept me going.

I needed to validate my existence. I need to learn that I am enough.

And keep a cap on my brashness and temper.